I CHANGED THE VACUUM BAG

Ok, so the vacuum bag was full. Like, so full, when you tried to vacuum something, it would spit Rice Krispies out at you. (We were vacuuming up Rice Krispies yesterday.) So all adult male members of the family being gone, Mom calls me, Megan, to change the vacuum bag. There was, however, a problem with that; I do (note: did) not know how to change a vacuum bag. My father and brothers are the vacuum tinkers in this family, with the result being I rarely even have to use the thing. (I'm terribly blessed, I know.)

"Mom, I don't know how to change the vacuum bag."

"Well you're seventeen years old, I'd think it's high time you learned!"

Mom had a good deal of convincing me that the bag needed to be changed now, not when Dad gets home tonight. I remained unconvinced, but ended up heading to the basement to look for the 'vacuum bin'. (In a house where the male members are vacuum fanatics, you actually have a bin with replacement parts and extra bags. Strange, I know.) Now where to find the vacuum bin? It actually was in the storage room, though I did not see it at first glance; it had been moved from a green bin to a grey bin. Why, don't ask me. The vacuum bin has always been a green bin.

I run upstairs and present myself, grinning ecstatically over the vacuum bag held in my hands. "I found the vacuum bag!"

My mother's look seemed to imply she found my statement an obvious one.

I'm actually expected to put the new bag in. So I sit down and look at the vacuum. Mom has deemed me intelligent enough to complete my task without advice from other persons.

"Mom, do you know how to change a vacuum?"

"Yes, my daughter."

"So how do you do it?"

My Mother happens to be walking into the next room, and does not apparently hear me.
I look at the vacuum. It has a lever that looks as if something might happen if you twist it. I therefore twist it. A few yanks and the top panel came off. Aha! There was the old bag. I yanked the old one out. (Didn't spill it all over myself, sorry.)

My Mother walked back in the room.

"Mom, I feel like Marty!"

Mom got immense amusement out of this statement. She giggled:

"Yeah, "how'd you get to be so old without knowin' how to do nothin'?""

So I manage to get the new bag in the vacuum, put the whole thing back together, tested the finished product, and felt immensely proud of myself. As I walk into the kitchen to throw the old bag away, I noticed the trash bag was full. As I attempted to shove it down further, my Mother walks in:

"Oh yeah, you wanna take that out too?"